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Why Giving Your Fertility Power Away Is Keeping You From Getting Pregnant

If you have been trying to conceive for a long time, there is a good chance you have quietly handed the reins to everyone else.

The specialist. The naturopath. The acupuncturist. The shaman. The Facebook group. The protocol. The app that tells you when to try and when to rest and when to feel hopeful.

And slowly, without even realising it was happening, your intuition went quiet.

Your fertility power is not gone. It has just been outsourced. And today I want to show you how to bring it back home to you.

The Moment I Stopped Giving My Power Away

About five years into my eight year journey to bring my son earthside, I went to see a Native American shaman. He came highly recommended. I had paid him a very handsome sum of money. And he looked at me and said words that rocked me to my absolute core.

He said: you will never be a mother in this lifetime.

I went home. I sat in the bathtub. I rocked back and forth and I said to myself over and over again, I will be a mother. I will be a mother.

And something came over me in that moment. A power I had not felt in years. And I made a declaration that changed everything.

I will never give my fertile power away again.

That was the catalyst. That was the moment I reclaimed my fertile energy for myself. And if I had trusted that shaman, or any number of the experts I had seen before him, I would not have my six year old son today.

What Reclaiming Your Fertile Power Actually Looks Like

I want to share a story about a client of mine because reclaiming your power looks different for every woman.

She was on a journey to become a solo mother using a known sperm donor. For twelve months she was flying all around the country through her ovulation windows, burning through money on flights and accommodation, squeezing conception into tiny stressful windows of time.

After a year of this she came to me exhausted and broken open. She said she did not know if she was cut out to be a mother. She did not know if her baby was coming.

I asked her one question. What would feel more expanded?

And she surprised herself with her answer. She had always wanted a natural conception. But what actually felt expansive, what felt like safety, was choosing IVF. Having a controlled environment. Knowing exactly when ovulation would happen and exactly when the embryo would be transferred.

She spoke to her donor. He agreed. She went through one round of IVF and her beautiful baby boy was conceived on the very first try.

She took her power back. And her baby came.

Reclaiming your fertile power does not mean you abandon medicine or ignore experts. It means your inner authority sits above everything else. If an expert says something that makes you feel less than, that drops you into fear, that makes you doubt your body, you do not have to receive that. Take what resonates and leave the rest.

The Shift That Happens Before Pregnancy

One of the biggest things I witness before a woman conceives is this. She stops making her baby the entire centre of her world and she starts coming back to herself.

She starts asking different questions.

What brings me joy? What creates expansion in my life? What flourishes my soul?

Here is why this matters on a physiological and energetic level. Your baby is conceived in your womb. Your womb lives in your sacral chakra. And your sacral chakra is the centre of your creativity and your life force energy.

What makes your sacral chakra vibrant and strong is not more tracking. It is not more supplements. It is not another protocol.

It is doing things you love. Having joy in your life. Making fun a priority.

When you do those things you become magnetic. Your energy becomes the kind of environment a soul wants to land in.

The Healing Cycle That Never Ends

I want to name something that I see over and over again in this community and it is keeping so many women stuck.

When we orient our energy toward being broken, we will always find more things to fix.

The mother wound. The father wound. The relationship pattern. The money blocks. The nervous system dysregulation. The ancestral trauma.

I am not saying these things are not real or that healing is not valuable. But if you go on a quest to fix what is broken, it never ends. Your soul will keep presenting you with more to work on because you have told it that this is what you want.

What I am suggesting is something different entirely.

Surrender it all.

You are not broken. You have never been broken. You are whole and perfect exactly as you are. And your baby does not need a perfectly healed mother. Your baby needs a magnetic one.

The Van Story

I am a surfer. For years I wanted to buy a van so I could throw my board in the back and go on adventures. But I kept telling myself it was not practical. Not until the baby comes. Not until life looks different.

Eventually I said, stuff it. I am not pregnant and I want to go surfing. I bought the van.

One month later I conceived my son.

I am not saying buy a van and you will get pregnant. I am saying that when I stopped contracting around what I did not yet have and started expanding into the life I was actually living, everything shifted.

Your baby wants to come into an expanded life. Not a life that has been put on hold waiting for them.

Alignment Is Not Vague. It Is Practical.

Most women already know what is out of alignment. They just have not been willing to look at it yet.

Are you in a job that feels good to your soul? Are you in a relationship that feels safe and supportive? Do you have enough financial security to feel at ease in your body?

These questions are not meant to create fear. What alignment looks like is completely different for every woman. For some, living simply with very little money is pure expansion. For others, having a financial cushion is what allows their nervous system to relax.

Only you know the answer for you.

When I was on my fertility journey and someone asked me if anything was preventing me from conceiving, I would say no. But I knew. Deep down I knew I was working in a job that was completely out of alignment with my soul. I was in denial. But I knew.

There may be something in your life right now that is coming up for review. Something your baby is asking you to shift that you have not yet been willing to shift. It might be as simple as putting down the ovulation sticks for a couple of months. Stopping the timed sex. Letting go of the basal temperature charts.

Not because those things are wrong. But because if they feel like a chore, your soul is already asking you to make a different choice.

Here is the simplest filter I know for your entire fertility journey.

Does this feel good to me?

If the answer is yes, keep going. If the answer is no, your soul is asking you to try something different.

Are you willing to make a different choice to meet your baby?

Coming Home to Your Fertile Power

Your intuition has not left you. It has just been talked over by everyone else’s opinions about your body and your journey.

When you start listening to it again, something remarkable happens. Your body begins to feel safe. And when your body feels safe, it sends you signals and messages you can actually act on. It becomes a partner in this journey rather than a problem to be managed.

Your fertile power was always yours. It is time to bring it back home.

If you are ready to stop outsourcing and start listening, your spirit baby is already trying to reach you.

Download the free Spirit Baby Meditation and begin receiving the messages your baby has been waiting to share with you.

Get Your Spirit Baby Meditation Here

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IVF Embryo Transfer Yoga: A Sacred Practice to Celebrate and Receive on Transfer Day

IVF Embryo Transfer Yoga: A Sacred Practice to Celebrate, Ground & Receive on Transfer Day

By Belle Tozer | Surf The Wild Woman

▶️ Watch the full practice on YouTube → https://youtu.be/gDJL5Gvkw3k

Transfer day. The moment everything has been building toward.

The injections. The scans. The protocols. The waiting. And now, finally, the moment of receiving.

But here is what most women don’t realise before they walk into that clinic: the energy you bring into your body on transfer day matters just as much as everything the clinic has prepared. Your nervous system, your breath, your womb space, they are part of this miracle too.

This practice was created for you, for today, for this sacred and extraordinary moment.

And here’s the thing that makes it different from everything else you might find about embryo transfer day: we’re not approaching this from a place of fear, anxiety, or gripping hope. We’re approaching it as a celebration.

Transfer Day Is a Celebration, Not Just a Procedure

The moment I want you to hold in your heart before we begin is this: you did it. You got here. That is worth celebrating before anything else.

So many women go into their embryo transfer holding their breath, bracing for the result, mentally already preparing for disappointment. And I completely understand that, this journey teaches you to protect your heart. But there is another way to meet this moment.

What if you walked into that clinic feeling lit up from the inside? What if your womb was warm, open, and joyful, genuinely excited to receive? What if transfer day felt less like a medical procedure and more like the most sacred welcome you have ever extended?

That is exactly what this yoga practice is designed to create.

The Practice: Mudras, Breath & Womb Awareness for Embryo Transfer Day

This is a gentle seated practice, no experience required, no flexibility needed. Just you, your breath, and a willingness to receive.

We begin with Gyan Mudra, placing the thumbs and index fingers together, resting the backs of the hands on your knees, palms facing up. This mudra creates balance in the body and a beautiful, steady energetic flow. From here, we simply breathe: inhale to lift through the chest, exhale to soften the shoulders back and down. And we let a smile rest gently on the face.

Not a forced smile. Just an allowing. A softening of the jaw, the tongue, the throat, and then letting that sense of smile travel all the way down into the heart.

Then the breath drops deeper, down into the womb.

This is the central point of our celebration today. Just holding awareness on whatever sensations arise in the belly. Witnessing the energy through body, mind, and spirit. You may notice a gentle sway begin and if you do, let it come. Let your body move however it needs to.

One of the visualisations I love in this practice is imagining yourself at a concert. Everyone’s hands are in the air. Everyone is slightly rocking together, left and right, unified in the celebration of creation. The smiles around you hold you. You feel the joy in other people’s hearts. You are not alone in this. You have never been alone in this.

From here, we move into Heart Mudra, bringing the pinkies and thumbs together to create a bowl shape, thumbs directed toward the heart. This is a gesture of pure receptivity. Open hands. Open heart. Open womb.

With each inhale, we open ourselves to the celebration of life, to the joy our children bring into this world, to the miracle that is already in motion. You may start to notice a colour, a sensation, a warmth. At the crown of the head, a sense of space and expansion. Let it come. Let it engulf your whole body.

Then we ground.

Hands on the floor. Connection with the earth. Head gently dropping, stretching the back of the neck, feeling the gentle pull through the shoulders. Coming back into your human body, your extraordinary, capable, miraculous human body that has carried you all the way to this day.

Each sensation is a celebration of you.

The practice closes with warmth. Palms covering the eyes, creating gentle pressure and heat. Drawing the awareness deep inside. Observing your optimum environment, the perfect balance you have created.

And then a hug. Arms wrapped around yourself. A thank you to the body that has done so much, carried so much, shown up again and again even when it was hard.

“I see my truth. I speak my truth. I am a celebration of truth. I honor you.”

Why This Approach to IVF Works

When I was on my own 8 year fertility journey, I tried everything, diets, supplements, healers, doctors. I know what it’s like to pour everything you have into this process and still feel like something is missing.

What was missing for me, and what I see missing for so many women, was the inner work. The energetic alignment. The connection to the deeper, more sacred dimension of what was happening in my body and in the quantum field.

The truth I want you to carry into your transfer today is this: your womb is not broken. She is wise. She is waiting to be brought back into sacred partnership with you.

When you approach your IVF cycle with presence, love, and an open heart, when you stop fighting the process and start flowing with it, everything shifts. The injections become medicine you receive with grace. The procedures become sacred steps. And the embryo transfer itself becomes one of the most profound acts of trust and love you will ever experience.

What Women Are Saying

“I completed Belle’s program while going through an IVF cycle. I can honestly say I have never felt more at ease and in the flow during a cycle. I really felt the magic in those modules. The daily meditations were so grounding and I felt supported by the universe at every turn. I felt connected to my baby and received so many beautiful messages.” Sarah

“I did Belle’s IVF Made Magical Program. I got pregnant on the third month after 3 years of trying to conceive.” Chantelle, Australia

Ready to Carry This Energy Through Your Entire IVF Cycle?

If this practice brought something alive in you, if you felt your body soften, your womb open, your heart settle, imagine having this level of support every single day of your IVF cycle.

IVF Made Magical is a 30 day quantum journey that gives you energetic, emotional, and spiritual support at every stage, from stimulation all the way through to transfer day and beyond.

Inside you’ll find:

3 Pre-IVF Meditations to ground your intentions and open your womb as a sacred space 19 IVF aligned audio meditations timed to each phase of your cycle A Transfer Day Activation to energetically anchor your yes A Womb and Embryo Connection Meditation to welcome your embryo with love An Unsuccessful Cycle Support Meditation to hold you gently if your cycle is not successful 19 Feminine Embodiment Movement Practices, gentle womb centred flows to reduce stress and keep your nervous system calm and receptive A beautiful 30 Day IVF Journal for daily reflections, spirit baby messages, and womb wisdom

All of this for just $97.

This is not a replacement for your medical care. It is a powerful companion to it, the piece that bridges your body, your soul, and the science of IVF into one sacred, aligned experience.

✨ JOIN IVF MADE MAGICAL FOR $97 → https://quantumstarbabies.com/ivf-program

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Trying to Conceive Over 40: Why One Word Can Shut Down Your Fertility

If you are trying to conceive over 40, there is a word being used in fertility clinics right now that I need to talk about. It is one word. And for many women, it is enough to unravel everything. That word is geriatric. I have worked with thousands of women on their path to motherhood, and I have watched this word do real damage. Not physically, but energetically. A woman walks into her appointment feeling connected, hopeful, trusting her body and her baby, and walks out convinced she is broken.

This is not okay. And it does not have to be your story.

“The body does not respond to age. It responds to signals.”

The Spell That One Word Casts

I call the term geriatric a fear spell. Because that is exactly what it is.

The moment a woman hears it, something shifts. She moves from a place of I believe my body can do this, to maybe I have left it too late. Maybe there is something wrong with me. Maybe this dream was never mine to have.

When she moves into that space, she moves into contraction. Fear floods the nervous system. The body reads that signal and does exactly what it is designed to do when danger is present. It pauses. It protects. It shuts down the reproductive system.

And when the body freezes, fertility pauses.

This is not a failure of your body. It is your body doing its job. The problem is the language that triggered it.

A Story I Will Never Forget

A couple of years ago, I had a client who was 52 years old.

She was deeply connected to her spirit baby. She had the dreams, the signs, the synchronicities. Her baby had been showing her the way for months. She knew, in her bones, that this child was coming.

Then she began seeing IVF doctors. And the word geriatric appeared. Over and over and over again.

By the time she found me, she was devastated. She had started to wonder whether she had made it all up. Whether the signs were just wishful thinking. Whether her age had finally made the decision for her.

What the medical system had failed to see was her vitality. Her vibrancy. Her unshakeable connection to her baby and her body. They had made age the only signpost, the only indicator, and in doing so, they had missed everything that actually mattered.

Chronologically she was 52. Energetically and emotionally, she was far younger than many women half her age sitting across from those same doctors.

“She had given her power away to an expert and a label. Together, we took it back.”

We worked through what was happening in her body and her mind. We worked through what it meant to disempower yourself by handing your truth over to a word someone else decided was relevant. And slowly, she began to return to herself.

She is now six months pregnant with her baby girl. 🌊

The Body Does Not Respond to Age

Here is what I want you to understand, and I want you to really let this in.

Your body does not respond to age. It responds to signals.

When fear is present, the body contracts. When contraction happens, fertility pauses. It is not personal. It is physiological.

But the opposite is also true.

When you return to safety, when you return to trust in your body and your baby, something opens. The fertile environment you have been trying to create? It already lives inside you. It does not need to be forced. It needs to be allowed.

I have seen women over 50, over 60, conceive their first baby when they stepped out of a limited reality and into a limitless one.

“In the space where all things are possible, women over 40 can conceive with ease.”

The Language You Use Matters More Than You Know

Think about waking up and saying to yourself: my body is hopeless. It just cannot do this.

Now think about waking up and saying: I am open. My baby will come in perfect timing.

Ask yourself honestly. Which one feels more true in your body?

The truth always feels expanded. And if you are choosing your reality right now, which reality do you want to choose? The one where you are unable, or the one where all things are possible?

Words matter. The way you speak to yourself matters. The way you speak to your womb and your reproductive system matters more than any label a clinic can give you.

When a Woman Stops Letting Fear Lead

When a woman stops identifying with a label like geriatric, something extraordinary becomes possible.

She moves from a limited reality to a limitless one. She stops letting fear lead and starts letting truth lead. And when her nervous system returns to safety, her body remembers what it is capable of.

This is the work. Not forcing. Not pushing harder. Returning.

Returning to your body. Returning to your baby. Returning to the truth of who you are and what you are here to do.

“When the body is in a place of safety, it is able to open up and blossom. This is what creates the fertile environment for your baby to land.”

Watch the Full Video

I recorded a full video walking you through exactly why the term geriatric is a fierce spell, how it works on the nervous system and the body, and how to begin reclaiming your fertile power at any age.

👉 Watch it here: This Medical Label Is Stealing Your Fertile Power

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this is landing for you, this is the exact work we do together inside Conceive with Cosmic Consciousness, my 12 week program for women who are ready to stop forcing fertility and start reconnecting with their body, their baby, and their own deep knowing.

You were not built to shrink under a label. You were built for this.

👉 Learn more about Conceive with Cosmic Consciousness: Learn More

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Trying to Conceive Over 40? You’re Not Too Late

Trying to conceive over 40 can bring up quiet fears you may not say out loud. You might be asking yourself, “Have I left it too late?” This question sits with many women on a fertility journey later in life. The truth is this: you have not missed your moment. You may be standing at the exact point your baby is waiting for.

For many women trying to conceive over 40, stress, pressure, and self doubt play a much bigger role than age itself.

My name is Belle. I have worked with hundreds of women trying to conceive over 40. Many of them believed age was the reason it had not happened yet. Biology does matter, but it is only one part of the story.

Why Being Over 40 Can Support Conception

Every generation expands in awareness. We grow beyond what our parents knew. The babies coming into the world now are arriving into a different level of consciousness. Many are choosing mothers who have lived, learned, and evolved.

Women over 40 often carry deep life experience. You may have faced heartbreak, loss, growth, or major change. These experiences shape you. They create wisdom and emotional depth. They prepare you for motherhood in powerful ways.

For many women, the fertility journey itself becomes a turning point. It encourages reflection. It invites change. It helps you release habits, relationships, and beliefs that no longer serve you. This process creates space for new life.

Stress, Waiting, and the Nervous System

Imagine someone could promise you that you would be pregnant by the end of the year. Many women feel instant relief when they imagine that certainty. If that idea softened your body, it may show where stress is still present.

When the body stays in tension, it sends signals of urgency and fear. This can make conception feel harder. A calm nervous system supports fertile energy. Relaxation is not giving up. It is allowing.

Your baby has chosen you because of who you are becoming. There are no mistakes in your timing. Even if the journey feels long, you are still exactly where you need to be.

Understanding Spirit Baby Communication

Many women ask what a spirit baby is. A spirit baby is the soul of your future child before they arrive on earth. If you feel a strong longing for a baby, that connection already exists.

Babies communicate in many ways. Some send messages through dreams. Others use songs, repeated words, or sudden feelings. Not everyone receives signs visually. Some people just know. Others feel messages in their body.

If you ever wonder whether something is a sign, that curiosity is often the answer.

Living Fully Creates Magnetic Energy

Many women pause their lives while waiting to conceive. They delay joy and plans. Living fully now creates fertile energy. When you choose yourself and your life, your energy shifts. That shift becomes magnetic for your baby.

Your baby wants you present and alive. Not waiting. Not holding back.

Ready for Deeper Support?

If you would like guidance and support connecting with your baby, I offer one to one Spirit Baby Sessions.

Book Your Session Here

You are not too late. Your body remembers. Your baby knows.

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Christmas and Infertility: When Christmas Hurts on Your Fertility Journey

Christmas is meant to feel magical… but when you’re trying to conceive and you’re not pregnant by Christmas, the holidays can hit differently.
If you’re navigating holiday grief on your fertility journey, feeling heavy, emotional, or wondering “I thought I’d be pregnant by Christmas”, this video is for you.

In this heartfelt video, I’m speaking directly to women experiencing TTC during the holidays, Christmas and infertility, and the quiet grief that comes with not having your baby yet. You are not broken. You are not behind. And you are not alone.

I share: Why Christmas can intensify fertility grief
How to support your nervous system during the holidays
Why longing and sadness don’t mean something is wrong
How your spirit baby may already be close and communicating
How to shift your fertility mindset during the holiday season

As a spirit baby medium and conscious conception guide, I’ve supported thousands of women through infertility at Christmas, TTC after 35, fertility over 40, and emotional healing on the fertility journey. I also share my own 8-year fertility journey and how I moved through eight Christmases of waiting.

If you’re experiencing: – Not being pregnant by Christmas
– Fertility grief during the holidays
– TTC after 35 or TTC after 40
– Emotional infertility or fertility sadness
– A deep longing you can’t explain

This video will help you feel seen, held, and supported.

Your baby is not gone.
Your spirit baby is already connected to you.
And 2026 may be the year your baby arrives.

Sending so much love to every future mama navigating the holidays.
Merry Christmas Mama, your baby is closer than you think 🤍

Watch the video here

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How to Survive the Holidays When You’re Still Waiting for Your Baby | Spirit Baby Guidance & Support

How to Survive the Holidays When You’re Still Waiting for Your Baby becomes more than a question, it becomes a lived experience many women silently carry. The holidays can crack you open in ways most people never see. Lights sparkle. Children line up for Santa… Families pose for photos, and beneath it all you may hold a quiet truth, you thought you would be a mother by now. This season can feel sharp and tender, like you are watching life from outside the window. But there is a way to move through it without abandoning yourself. One breath at a time.

Hold Your Heart With Care

You do not need to be strong every moment. You are allowed to step back. You can leave early. You can say no to what feels heavy. Your nervous system matters. Your spirit baby does not want you pushing through pain. They want you connected to your inner world. They do not measure your worth by how well you hold everything together. Give yourself permission to soften. Rest is valid. Tears are valid. Your heart deserves care and space.

Your Baby Is Closer Than It Seems

Spirit babies are not distant. They travel with you through the holidays and speak through signs, songs, feathers, dreams, and quiet waves of emotion. You may feel them most when you miss them. If tears rise when you see children at Christmas, it does not mean you are broken. It is because your baby is near. They are brushing against your energetic field. They are preparing you. Instead of saying “I should be over this,” try “this ache is connection.” Longing is not failure. It is a doorway.

Invite Your Baby Into Your Space

You do not need to wait for physical arrival to include them in your season. Spirit babies love being acknowledged. They feel wanted through intention. Hang an ornament for them. Write them a letter and place it under the tree. Light a candle and invite their presence. Speak to them in the quiet of night. Let your heart talk to theirs. Let them be part of your holiday now.

Protect Your Energy

There will be moments that sting. People may ask careless questions. You do not need to explain your journey or justify anything. Your task is to protect your frequency. Place your energy first. Create micro sanctuaries that help you return to yourself. A walk. A journal page. Five minutes of breathing. A simple meditation. Remind yourself: you are not behind. You are becoming.

This Season Is Not Proof You Are Alone

You are evolving with your baby even if no one sees it. Grief and hope can live in the same body. You are allowed to feel both. Your baby is not late. They are aligning you. They are teaching you. They are closer than this season makes you believe. You are not waiting for life to start. You are in sacred preparation.

Ready to Connect With Your Baby?

If this season is stirring something inside you, a pull, a presence, a feeling like your baby is close, you do not have to navigate that alone. Your spirit baby is already communicating. Sometimes you just need support to hear them more clearly.

If you would love guidance, reassurance, or a deeper connection with your baby, you can book a 1:1 Spirit Baby Reading with me. Together, we’ll explore what your baby is trying to show you, the timing of their arrival, and the energetic pieces unfolding in your journey.

✨ Book your reading here:
https://surfthewildwoman.com/product/https-surfthewildwoman-com-product-spirit-baby-reading/

Your baby is reaching for you. Let’s listen.

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